Having too many items on your countertops and piles of unsorted mail aren’t the only ways to define clutter. Clutter comes in all forms, including having too many commitments. Are commitments cluttering your life?
Most homeschool families have one or two working parents and kids who participate in outside activities nearly seven days out of the week. A typical family can easily expect to have multiple commitments pulling them every which way on a daily basis. Having too many commitments make it hard or nearly impossible to be organized.
Now that we have dealt with our mindset and cleaning that up, it’s now time to take action. One of the first steps in being more organized is decluttering your calendar. Being able to prioritize your commitments and make cuts when needed can reduce stress, create opportunities to be more streamlined, and increase your personal happiness. You don’t have to say yes to everything that comes your way and spread yourself too thin. You have the ability and the responsibility to simply say NO.
Here are some tips for streamlining commitments:
Tip #1: Just Say No. Consider no as an automatic response. If your weekends are busy, then simply say no. You don’t have to worry about other people’s feelings if you know that there is no room in your schedule to make a commitment. It’s not personal, it’s about progress! Most of the time people won’t be offended if you decline their presented opportunity. Be kind, have a blanket statement ready, and simply say no to the request.
Tip #2: Have a Family Meeting. Decide as a family what sort of commitments are on or off the calendar. Making decisions together helps families work towards a common goal. If you are committing to a bunch of activities and the lawn is never mowed or the laundry is never washed, how can one expect to be effective. Decide together what activities you will commit to and what actions need to be taken to maintain the status quo at home and/or in business. If the cost for saying yes is too high, then declining the commitment is the right thing to do.
Tip #3: Evaluate Your Priorities. Look at the commitments you are making and ask yourself why you make them.
- Could you be saying yes to anything out of guilt or coercion?
- Are you enjoying the commitments you have?
- Do you feel as though you are searching for self-value or validation?
If you aren’t a heck yes about what you are doing, then you may want to consider putting a lid on it and walking away. Don’t allow guilt, a lack of self-worth or a misguided sense of responsibility overwhelm your schedule.
Tip #4: Agree to a “Commitment Fast”. For one month, cut out all unnecessary commitments. Try fasting from commitments and see what you and your family think at the end of the month. Do you feel more refreshed and less harried? Did you realize you feel better having less to do outside the home? Was it easier to stay on top of chores, resting, and doing things you love? A Fast will show you if you’d like to consider limiting your commitments on a more permanent basis.
Almost a year ago this time, I was met with the tragedy of the loss of my father. During that time, I was unaware of the amount of commitments I was truly engaged in. My father lived with me and my family and we were his caregivers. With that said, I would end up being the one to discover him, in bed, unresponsive one evening before dinner. TOTALLY UNEXPECTED to say the least! Hours later it would seem like my brain would go into survival mode. I wasn’t able to mentally process ANY of my prior engagements outside of the house.
I tried, but I just couldn’t get it together. My focus was off, my attention span was null. That is when I started my ME (mentally exhaling) Time moments again to allow God to refocus and recharge me. By the time Summer was ending, I’d realized that I had been doing entirely too much. No wonder people would ask how did I do it all. HA! After my awakening, I made calls and wrote emails explaining as humbly and gracious as I could that I could no longer commit to and participate in “xyz”.
FREEDOM!!!
My husband was ecstatic, my kids were excited. My commitment has been refocused on my home and family and the rewards from it are unimaginable.
At certain stages in life, commitments may seem like an unavoidable aspect of life. To some extent they are, but more often than not, they are part of a mindset and habit of behavior that feels normal…not healthy, normal. NOT GOOD!
You can declutter your schedule and remove commitments, making way for more time and more peace in your life. Consider evaluating your calendar and begin making those changes.
