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The Beginner’s Guide to Mentally Exhaling (ME time)
Mentally Exhaling is one of the most important practices or habits busy moms should aim to implement into their lives. For me, with all of the duties of managing home, family, and our family businesses, it has been a rewarding experience and essential for me to have a peaceful, balanced, and orderly life overall. I often like to refer to Mentally Exhaling as my ME time.
My life tends to be a pretty interesting one. I’m the wife to my high school sweetheart. Hey Babe! I’ve been a homeschooling mom for over 20 years now. My family has owned quite a few businesses in different industries over the years, and we’re currently caregivers. Mentally Exhaling (ME Time) has become one of the greatest methods of relaxation that I’ve added into my life. I often tell myself it’s for the survival of me AND my family.
Happy Wife…Happy Life!
Many years ago I read a book entitled Maximize The Moment by T.D. Jakes. I didn’t get past chapter one and was awakened to what was actually going on in my life. A week hadn’t gone by before I’d scheduled a “meeting” with my closest friends to give them my “hours of operation” and boundary setting rules that HAD to be set for my sanity and my wellbeing.
What exactly did setting boundaries look like? My girlfriends probably thought I was out of my mind, but I proceeded:
- “I will no longer be accepting calls after 7 pm, unless there is an emergency.”
- “If I don’t NEED to know something, please don’t share it with me.”
DRASTIC??? Not at all!
The list went on and on, but those were the top two that needed to be dealt with immediately.
Those were some of the very first steps I took to usher me into creating a lifestyle that included allowing my body AND my brain to take a break…to Mentally Exhale!
What is Mentally Exhaling?
Mentally Exhaling is ultimately allowing your entire being to breathe, rest, refocus, reorganize, and refresh itself.
I know, I know…I hear you now:
“Nikky, you doing too much girl.”
“I don’t have a minute in a day to do all of that.”
“My schedule is overflowing and I can’t even find the time to breathe.”
“I am in full demand from the time I wake up until the time I go to bed.”
I hear you and I understand fully…
The husband
The kids
The parents/in-laws
The pets
Work
Housework
Schooling
Cooking
Cleaning
Laundry
Bills
Errands
…and that’s just with your personal life.
We haven’t even gone into ALL that takes place outside of the home, and for some of us that could mean 7 days a week.
When it all boils down, YOU haven’t even made it to the list yet. Just sayin’! THIS has got to change. You are too valuable not to be tended to. You can do this!
What Are Some of the Benefits of Mentally Exhaling?
This is just a brief list of some of the benefits of having and experiencing successful times of Mentally Exhaling.
- The refocusing, refreshing, rebooting, reorganizing of your brain
- Helps to hear your inner voice more clearly
- Helps you to destress and unwind
- Aids in the improvement of focusing and concentration
- Things lying dormant inside of you begin to awaken
- Allows you to discover YOU, your giftings, and calling
- Definitely strengthens your relationship with God and your loved ones
- Helps you to become more productive
How to Get Started with Mentally Exhaling?
With all that’s going on around you, you are going to have to be intentional about taking moments to have these breaks…to breathe…to Mentally Exhale.
So let’s get started…
Right now, wherever you are, at this very moment while reading this, PAUSE! Press play on the video below. Take 5 minutes to close your eyes, breathe slowly and deeply and begin by thanking God for your life, health, and strength. After that, simply sit there and do absolutely NOTHING for the remaining time.
I love these moments of silence. After I sit for a moment, I then ask the Lord to speak to my heart, and I sit quietly (sometimes in prayer/meditation). There are times that I’ve had my ME time for three hours or more. I always take a journal with me, and there have been many times where I’ve come out with pages and pages of notes, instruction, plans, ideas, dreams, etc.
Now that you’ve had your very first Mentally Exhaling experience. Comment below and share with us what it was like for you.
Tips for Success During Your ME Time.
Here are a few simple tips and suggestions for maximizing these ME time moments.
- Find a place of solace in your home, away from all distractions. If it has to be a bathroom, or even if you have to go outside to sit in your car, so be it. REMEMBER…we’re being intentional about this!
- Play soft instrumental music of your liking. The video shared above is from one of my favorite YouTubers to listen to during these times.
- Set candles or lower your lighting.
- Always have a journal and writing utensil available. You NEVER know what you may discover when you give yourself permission to disconnect from all of the to-do’s and allow your brain to breathe.
- Having a soothing beverage would really top it all off.
- Make this time NECESSARY! This is for YOU! This is your ME time!
Common Questions About Mentally Exhaling
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How do I begin to put ME on my schedule?
- I often have my ME time at night after the house is down and after I’ve showered and gotten ready for bed. If you are an early riser, that time of day may be a better time for you. When the kids are in practice, and you’re waiting in the car, you could make that your time.
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How can I get my husband and family to support this need?
- Please have the conversation. Explain to them how crucial it is for the betterment of YOU overall. For example, if you suffer from anxiety or the like, these can be moments of healing for you. Your family needs you and once the issue has been brought to the surface, they should be super supportive in your need to have a crack in time to exhale.
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What are the benefits?
- As women, we are always ON. We don’t have the privilege of clocking in and out of our duties as wives and mothers. Sometimes the brain simply needs a break from it all. Brain fog, forgetfulness, disorientation, anxiety, confusion, depression, and oppression are just some of the common conditions we experience that can greatly benefit from the praxis of Mentally Exhaling.
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What if I don’t have a place to retreat to?
- For me, over the past few years, my master closet had become my War Room (prayer room). This is where I can lock myself away and escape. I’ll share more in detail about my oasis in the near future. If your only place of solace is a bathroom or out in the car, like I mentioned before, it can definitely be accomplished. How about driving to a park being surrounded by nature? I have a girlfriend who likes to have her ME time while she takes her daily walk at her local park. Even if none of the above seems to work for you, try it out while lying in bed, morning or evening, close your eyes and activate your time of respite right there. Like I mentioned before…BE INTENTIONAL! You can soooo do this!
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How much time does it take and how often should I do it?
- For starters, I’d say at the very least, try once a week. Set a day, time, and time limit that works best for you. The more you do it, you’ll automatically know how much time is needed. Actually, you will find yourself beginning to crave these moments. Just start NOW and commit to trying again a week from now and go on from there.
Final Words About Mentally Exhaling
So Chica, what have we learned here today?
- YOU ARE IMPORTANT!
- You MUST put YOU on your schedule.
- ME time is an amazing practice to begin, not only for mental clarity and health reasons but also to begin to prioritize yourself. To get in touch with who you are…REALLY. Allowing God to reveal and speak to your heart. To give your brain a break and allow it to breathe.
Although this post mainly focused on the wife and mommy, I often encourage my husband and boys to have their own versions of me time as well. It’s beneficial for us all.
Don’t forget to comment below and let us know what your very first ME time experience was like.
Please share this information with your friends. You never know what lies beneath the surface of some of the smiles you see.
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Share your ME time pics with us and be sure to use the hashtag #mentallyexhaling.
Until next time,
Nikky